


Don't be scared

by upintheattic



Category: My Babysitter's A Vampire
Genre: Character Study, Hurt No Comfort, Light Angst, benny needs a hug, i just didnt show it because it wasnt important to the plot, this isnt a bethan fic and there's no mention of it but they are together in this, well kinda i guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-01-11
Packaged: 2021-03-15 07:33:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28684893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/upintheattic/pseuds/upintheattic
Summary: Benny learns a new spell and wants to show his friends but high emotions keep things from going as planned resulting in someone getting hurt.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12





	Don't be scared

**Author's Note:**

> i kinda tried different writing style for this one so if you've read something by me before uhhh this is going be really different. its a little OOC because the canon gives me very little to work off of! and i had just started typing and didn't stop until this popped out. its longer than my usual fics and it feels a little more dramatic to but i like it. i wrote it in a few hours but i spelled checked it. enjoy ;p

He didn’t really know what the trigger for it was. There had been so much on his mind lately that it was hard to pinpoint the direct cause, things had been rough and there were too many close calls. Erica almost got an arm bitten off, Ethan got a vision so bad he couldn’t sleep for three days, Rory got his hand crushed and it took a week longer than it should have to fully heal, Sarah had disappeared for two weeks without ever explaining herself but didn’t act too differently afterwards. 

And Benny? Well, Benny himself got hurt more from practicing magic than fighting monsters. In all honesty, he knew he could be impulsive and careless and overall reckless, but he never meant to hurt anyone. The thought that he could hurt someone he loved never really crossed his mind, he never wanted it to happen and he just assumed it never would. He supposes looking back his logic wasn't as flawless as he may have believed at first. So when Ethan did get hurt by Benny’s hand this time it had really shaken him up, they got hurt fighting monsters all the time and usually it was never too bad. No hospital trips yet if grandma Weir had anything to say about it at least. But hindsight is still 20/20 and something bad was bound to happen. 

Benny was never good with thinking ahead. He was always in the here and now and for him it was a good way to be, but the ‘here and now’ was always switching up so quickly in his head. He wanted to learn new spells, he wanted learn to charms, he wanted learn new potions, he wanted learn-

He just wanted to learn magic, all of it and everything it had to offer. He wanted to be good at it too. The latter was the difficult part. Benny could learn a spell inside and out but often it still wanted work right. Grandma Weir insisted it was because he wasn’t working hard enough and that he needed to work by the book. Every time it was the same thing ‘You’re rushing your words. You hesitated. You didn’t concentrate hard enough. Try again. Do it again. Again.’ Sometimes Benny couldn’t stand his grandmother while still loving her dearly, to him she was really the only family he felt he had left. Even his dad’s calls seemed to be less and less. Still she was little help to him when it came to comfort and support. He assumed she just didn’t know how or had forgotten after being alone for so long. She wasn’t much of a teacher either, only telling him what he did wrong and nothing more than that.

He remembers pushing all his thoughts behind him and thinking only about the spell and the magic that would flow through him. From his core through his hand and out of his body triggered by his words. He remembers Ethan being the only one to actually think he could do the spell. “I still think this is too dangerous. Maybe you should try practice it more.” Sarah had become more cautious since Ethan's restless nights from a vision, but his friends doubt only made him more frustrated and edger to try and prove them wrong. “Come on guys. At least let him try.” Ethan’s voice always smoothed out Benny’s anger. “I think you can do it, Ben.” He added just soft enough for only him to hear.

Maybe that was it. Maybe had been the trigger. Probably not.

It should’ve been simply really. A basic fireball spell, nothing fancy he just needed to create a ball of fire in his hands and throw it to the brick wall straight ahead of them. It should’ve been easy for him, it was only level two magic and he’d been studying extra hard just to prove himself, besides a fire spell would be super helpful in fights since they didn’t have many long distance attacks. They should’ve been cheering him on really, at least that's how Benny saw it. So without listening to whatever unencouraging thing Erica felt like saying then, Benny focused all the warmth and fervor in his body building into his magic core. Steadying himself he went through the check list of the spell’s steps in his head before starting.

Step one; build up heat in the pit of your stomach.  
Step two; push the ball of heated magic from your stomach through your arm and to your hand. Let it move through you. (Beginners should picture the action in their head to better visualize the spell working).  
Step three; allow the heat to pool in the palm of your hand and like a match to gasoline speak out the words to trigger the flame to form and build into a ball of fire. Don’t force it out or you could lose control quickly. Control your breathing as well.  
Step four; maintain the ball of fire in its shape while aiming, beginners should keep it as small as a baseball, and throw as if it was a physical ball. Remember to release the magic completely from your body for it to leave your palm.

So far steps one to three had gone off without a hitch, his friends watching impressed at how controlled he behaved. “I didn’t think you could do it but whoa this is awesome!” Rory never failed at unknowingly giving backhanded compliments, but Benny was willing to take what he could get. Even if it made the pit in his stomach rage slightly, without noticing the fire in his hand sparked but remained its size. “I guess you're not completely bad at magic, witch boy.” Erica poked at him. Another spark. Benny tried not to snap back, laughing instead. They were just playing around.

But sometimes even friends know just how to push you over the edge. “It’s really cool you can do that, Benny. But maybe you should keep practicing making a fireball before you start throwing it everywhere.” Sarah had meant nothing bad. She was nervous. She had gotten more nervous, mostly she was nervous around magic. Benny tried to keep up his mask of cheerfulness but more sparks came, Ethan seeming to be the only one to notice.

“I know what I’m doing, Sar. I’ve been reading up on fire magic all month. Besides, it's a brick wall. I can’t really burn it down with something this small. I don’t get what’s with the lack of trust.” He wasn’t trying to argue. Really he wasn’t if anything it had slipped out. More sparks. The ball grew larger by a few inches.

“It’s not like I don’t trust you but maybe you haven’t noticed that your magic tends to get out of hand,” she shot back with a kick to her voice, a tone she never used towards him before. “Not to mention I’m always the one who has to clean it up so I think maybe don’t set the town fire.” Benny hadn’t known where this was coming from. He never got into a fight with Sarah before even as different as they were things were always smooth between them. Sometimes Ethan would get on edge and tell him to cool it on trying out any extra difficult magic, but Ethan had always been wary of this sort of thing and even he wasn’t that worried. It was basic stuff, what was there to be scared of? 

Benny hadn’t noticed the sparks were getting larger and more frequent as he snapped back at her, the rage in his stomach boiling hot. “Because you always put yourself in that position. If you just let me prove to you I wont set anything on fire you’d see this would be really useful and super kickass in a fight. Besides, you’re not exactly perfect, okay.” He was fuming now and something in him wouldn’t let him back down even after Ethan, Rory, and Erica had tried to get them to stop. Their words falling on deaf ears. “I’m not the one who needs a babysitter so just lay off already.” Benny had no idea the fire in his hand was growing big enough to start to burn his hand and sear the bottom of his shirt, the heat coming from it felt unnatural. But it was still just small enough to keep under control, no bigger than a soccer ball in his palm.

Then it happened. It went by so quick that no one had time to fully react soon enough. Ethan had only meant to help. “Ben, its okay just stop-”

Benny turned to shout for him to stay out of it at the same time Ethan had gone to grab Benny’s upper arm, he thought his hand was high enough to escape the flames. It wasn’t. The flame roared upwards, the blue-purple light shining bright and creating shadows on Benny’s face. His eyes going wide and fearful as he saw his best friend get burned by the raise of the fire, he hadn’t meant to lose control and hurt him. Ethan doubled over in pain, holding his hand close to his chest and falling to ground on his knees. Erica and Rory bent down to help him, Sarah stared straight at Benny who was too shaken up to move, her eyes soft and sad but remained watchful all the same.

What had he done? He didn’t mean to- but he had and now- Damnit!

The pit in Benny’s stomach went cold as if a block of ice had dropped there and the flames died down before being completely snuffed out by Benny’s clenching fist. Suddenly the rage washed over into guilt and worry. “E, are you okay?” He kneed down next to friend to try and help somehow. Ethan put out his unburned hand and shook his head as he leaned on Rory. 

“Don’t-'' Ethan cut himself short, opting to comfort himself from the pain instead of continuing the subtle attempt to keep Benny out of arm’s reach. “It’s okay. Don’t worry.” Rejected, Benny stood away from his friends. He couldn’t bring himself to move or speak. 

It wasn't until later that Benny felt comfortable to say anything, mostly it was an assortment of apologies. The gang had gotten Ethan safely to the Weir house where grandma Weir quickly cooked up a remedy to heal the burns on both Benny and Ethan’s arms. It was quiet and everything felt very still and slow like any wrong move would set him off again. The others had left once Ethan felt better, the pain subsiding over the remedy as it cooled the stinging.

They sat alone in the kitchen waiting for his grandma to say it was safe for Ethan to leave. “I’m sorry,” Benny choked out not wanting to start sobbing. “I swear I didn't mean to hurt you. I didn’t even think I could. Guess I was wrong again.’ He forced out a strained laugh, avoiding the seer’s eyes. “Sarah was right. I’m really sorry, E. I promise to be more careful. I don’t want to hurt you again.”

“I know, Ben. I’m not mad.” Ethan said, his voice small and dripped in affection. He sounded more sorry than he had any right to be. If Benny hadn’t felt so guilty he would’ve called him out. “Besides, you were doing really well and everything is okay now.” Ethan smiled at him but was met with downcast eyes, the air felt heavy and thick. “Listen, Benny, I’m not scared of you.”

“What’s that supposed to-” Benny was cut short by his grandmother who rushed through the kitchen door with bottles of varying colored fluids in hand. They would have to finish this another time then.

“These aren’t normal burns,” she explained as she wrapped Ethan’s arm in new bandages. “Magic burns are much worse. You’re lucky it wasn’t worse or else it would’ve never healed. Still, I’m afraid this one might leave some scarring. Treat it like any other burn and be very careful not to over use your powers for at least a week. That goes for you too, Mister” She looked towards her grandson sternly. His grandma’s words did nothing to comfort him, but that’s how all her words felt to him. Just great, not only does he hurt his best friend but it could’ve caused him pain forever? Maybe Sarah and the others were right. Maybe he was just a lost cause at magic, clearly he wasn’t any good.

“What do I tell my parents?” Ethan asked, poking at his arm and wincing slightly.

“No one with human eyes will be able to see it. If the burn was deeper it might have stopped your flow of powers in that arm. You’ll be fine. The spell wasn’t that powerful yet.” Christ, every word she said really did make everything feel 10x more awful. Ethan stayed silent, his eyes stealing a small glance at Benny who deflated sadly in his seat. Suddenly Ethan got up.

“Thanks for your help, Ms. Weir. But I really need to get going.” He turned to Benny, considered what to do next and settled on a small smile. “I’ll talk to you later, Ben.”

“Yeah. Okay.” Benny answered back sounding as pathetic as he felt. “See ya, dude.”

There were a few long moments of silence after Ethan left their home, his grandmother looking down on him with a sad and shameful look. He felt like she was judging him, picking which punishment or lecture she should bother with him now, he already felt awful how else could she make it worse? Her eyes on him already felt as hot as the flames from before and he couldn’t help but fidget in his seat. Why did she always have to do this before getting short with him? 

“Yes?” He finally said after another few moments of silence, annoyed she hadn’t spoken first.

“You're very powerful.” She replied bluntly causing Benny to almost flinch. “Remember that next time you get worked up during a spell. Don’t let it happen again.” Benny was confused and if he was honest angry with her. Part of him wanted her to punish him for hurting his friend and being reckless, for once he felt like he truly deserved it. Another part of him, the small and selfish part, felt it would be unfair to kick him while he’s down. All parts of him were frustrated by her words instead.

“I wasn’t trying to get worked up. It was Sarah and she just,” he made a muffled sound in the back of his throat in a failed attempt to get the right words out. “I just wanted to prove I could do it.” He finished lamely sitting back in his seat.

“It didn’t prove anything.” Her eyes were glassed over now as if she might cry. She wouldn’t look at him anymore. It only made him more mad. “Don’t be so careless next time. It doesn’t give you any flavors.” He wanted to scream. Not even at her. Or at anyone really, perhaps just himself, but either way he wanted to scream until his lungs were burning up again and he couldn’t feel a sound coming from his throat. 

He settled on a soft “Okay. I won’t let it happen again.” and stood from his chair to go upstairs. He needed to go to bed and just forget today because tomorrow would be spent repeating ‘I’m sorry’ to Ethan and avoiding the others. He didn’t want to think about that now. That was tomorrow. Tonight he just wanted to sleep and forget everything. Despite knowing he couldn’t. He’d lay awake thinking, same as always.

“You’re very strong,” she cupped his face as he tried to make his way to leave. “You remind me of your mother. She was reckless too.”

“Is that why she’s gone?” He leaned into his grandmother’ touch. She didn’t answer, she didn’t really need to. He understood enough. “I’ll be careful.” He had never seen his grandma cry before. He didn’t know how to comfort her. Maybe it was genetic, to be selfish and reckless and unable to know how to love people properly. 

“You’re important to me.”

“I know. I love you too.” He kissed his grandma’s forehead and went upstairs. The entire time wondering about why everyone seemed to be wary and nervous of him and his abilities. He had them for a year now and he was still only barely decent at the basics, nothing changed so why were they so afraid of him now? What had he done wrong this time? Everything always felt like his fault maybe it really was.

Maybe there had been more than one thing to trigger it.

**Author's Note:**

> i've played with this idea before of benny either being a tiny bit unhinged or people thinking he is so i ran with that (again) for this one. i want write more this was kinda fun but i dont really do angst tho. i'm going try to move on to different ideas :T next fic will be something new! probably still going be bethan tho lol but more about ethan instead probs with a lot of yearning too :] {tumblr is transbibennyweir} goodnight everybody!


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